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In a world full of sluts, We keep the wet dream alive. [entries|friends|calendar]
Asshole.

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hey wanna throw up? Get me naked. [16 Apr 2008|01:27pm]
let's get the fuck out of here, it's like a congregation.
from every drink's glass drips condensation.
she's got her jacket on her back.
we put our last drinks back
and hit the first red light.


no one moves; no one stands

red-lip-sticks on her drink glass


i've got somewhere else to be
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show me some of that spanish dancin.. [12 Apr 2008|08:56pm]
[ mood | exanimate ]

so i went out to eat for my moms birthday today. and my family made me dance with a belly dancer. it was pretty fucking awesome. and i would totally rather go see a bunch of girls belly dancing than stripping. maybe its just me.    

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some things that make me happy. [27 Mar 2008|02:00pm]
[ mood | amused ]

When I write something thats been stuck in my head forrever, and it actually sounds good.
Beaches! i can't wait for it to be warm.
music!
outside. I love woods and driving in the middle of nowhere lately.
Transportation! I love trains. and bridges. And airplanes. and helicopters. and boats. and i want a bike.
my guitar.
reading a good book over like Catcher in the Rye. Or Johnny Got his Gun.


More later. =]

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I am... [26 Mar 2008|04:57pm]
a nomad. I travel so much I don't know where my home is.
heartbroken. From all the sluts, whores, and just inconsiderate people who only care about their feelings.
Confused. About where my life's going.
Lost.
Honest. I tell you what i'm thinking.
Hopeful. I want to see my life turn out better than my past.
Nihilistic. I don't like people, nor do I trust many. [see misanthropy.]
homeless[right now]
lonely. I just want a pretty girl to be mine no bullshit no drama.
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[24 Mar 2008|12:54pm]
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ohh. [21 Mar 2008|01:49pm]
I know that it is freezing but I think we have to walk
I keep waving at the taxis; they keep turning their lights off
But Julie knows a party at some actor’s west side loft
Supplies are endless in the evening; by the morning they’ll be gone.

When everything is lonely I can be my own best friend
I get a coffee and the paper; have my own conversations
With the sidewalk and the pigeons and my window reflection
The mask I polish in the evening, by the morning looks like shit.

And I know you have a heavy heart; I can feel it when we kiss
So many men stronger than me have thrown their backs out trying to lift it
But me I’m not a gamble you can count on me to split
The love I sell you in the evening, by the morning won’t exist.

You’re looking skinny like a model with your eyes all painted black
You just keep going to the bathroom always say you’ll be right back
Well it takes one to know one, kid, I think you’ve got it bad
But what’s so easy in the evening, by the morning is such a drag.

I’ve got a flask inside my pocket we can share it on the train
If you promise to stay conscious I will try and do the same
We might die from medication, but we sure killed all the pain

But what was normal in the evening, by the morning seems insane.

And I’m not sure what the trouble was that started all of this
The reasons all have run away but the feeling never did
It’s not something I would recommend, but it is one way to live
Cause what is simple in the moonlight, by the morning never is
What’s so simple in the moonlight, now is so complicated
What’s so simple in the moonlight, so simple in the moonlight

















WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK.
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HEMINGWAY [13 Mar 2008|08:20pm]
Love is just another dirty lie. Love is ergoapiol pills to make me come around because you were afraid to have a baby. Love is quinine and quinine and quinine until I'm deaf with it. Love is that dirty aborting horror that you took me to. Love is my insides all messed up. It's half catheters and half whirling douches. I know about love. Love always hangs up behind the bathroom door. It smells like lysol. To hell with love. Love is making me happy and then going off to sleep with your mouth open while I lie awake all night afraid to say my prayers even because I know I have no right to anymore. Love is all the dirty little tricks you taught me that you probably got out of some book. All right. I'm through with you and I'm through with love. Your kind of pick-nose love. ( To Have and Have Not)
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i want to... [11 Mar 2008|01:25am]
start using this again. It's been a long time. Where is everyone?
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Writer's Block: I'm Ashamed of... [11 Mar 2008|01:18am]
What are you ashamed of?
I'm ashamed of feelings i'm unable to express. I'm ashamed that i throw away food when people are still dying of starvation. I'm ashamed that I live in a country where Bush gets reelected and bombs are dropped for personal gain. I'm ashamed of the words i'll never be able to say to you. I'm sorry.
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MLK day. [15 Jan 2007|11:35am]
[ mood | nostalgic ]



this has been a long long weekend.
happy MLK day.
i'm going to get some stuff. lemmeee know.

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well. [29 Dec 2006|06:31am]
[ mood | cold ]

I crashed my car. Kind of. And it caused a lot of fucking damage and just sucks. And I need to vent this some how. I hate fucking winding roads. and deer. I definitely didn't need this.

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sup? [07 Dec 2006|05:06am]
Within the past three days, two fucking awesome shows. Ten dollars. Moder Life is War and Some Girls ruled. and i got to see a lot of people, no matter how awkward some of it was. Definitely honest nostalgia. Anyway. I saw The Recieving End Of Sirens tonight at WNEC for free. It was a pretty fucking awesome show. Dezi, adam, and I went. i also saw some good faces.

anyway. I'm going to Ohio until Sunday. family stuff. and even more people I can't wait to see. I'm so serious. It's going to be a long needed vaca. from everything. So maybe i'll get on? who knows.




In ten years, we'll go to Ohio,
steal Cadillacs for a living. <333333333333333333
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i can probably [03 Dec 2006|07:46am]
drink more than you.
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five years in the making. [28 Nov 2006|04:06am]
last night I did something stupid. Not to say stupid, but rather untimely. it was something I had waited for longer than anyone could imagine, an ideal and action I secretly strived for. the moment itself was enough to take my breath away, even now. enough to make the butterflies in my stomach feel like bats. to make me smile from the inside out. It was a feeling I haven't truly grasped in I don't know how long. I felt as if my heart lept from my chest, and raced me all the way home, smiling. It was the first night in a long time I had a night's sleep unaided by drugs, alcohol, or medicine; if you can call two hours a night's sleep. I couldn't fall asleep at all. My mind was elsewhere. the situation that surrounded this moment made it sadly beautiful and tragic, like the sparrow in the kitten's jaw. like bonnie and clyde.

i don't regret it. is the point of writing this. documenting a moment I won't forget. something worth waiting a lifetime.
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AYYYYYYYYY [29 Oct 2006|06:25am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I saw Third Eye Blind tonight out of nowhere. it was incredible. in fucking credible.

Freud said that love was a good psychosis, But I don't know. I've had too many doses. He's a creep, and we all know that. He probably made it up. Believe in me and this lie, Tell me everything will be all right. Cause it's so good to believe,but don't turn my hope into a weapon. I kept your sweater until the scent was gone, Wrapped up in my hands when the days were long. But I'm still sniffing, I walk alone in the concrete with the living.

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welllll [26 Oct 2006|07:38pm]
[ mood | nostalgic ]

Nicole left. i love how all my close friends move to the fucking ends of the earth. &&my dad forgot my birthday. it's tomorrow, and honestly, i wish it was over and done with already. I'm probably not doing anything for it. byee.


[Nostalgic may not be the right word, but it's the only one that comes to mind.]

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PS. [09 Oct 2006|01:09pm]
I still would have given you my pickle if you were around.
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It's taken long enough to get this out. [24 Sep 2006|12:45pm]
[ mood | drained ]

I've waited far too long to say this.


here it goes.Collapse )


I needed to say this. this is not the way you treat friends. Or people. 
a lie 
is a lie 
is a lie. 
I don't give a fuck how pretty; it's disguise
.

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my telephone. [21 Sep 2006|10:46pm]
Is broken. I won't have one for like, a week. I just have really really bad luck. I'm serious.
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yeah. [17 Sep 2006|03:22pm]
I got too fucked up again
And passed out on the plane
Tried to forget you
I can't forget you

No sleep on this flight
I'll think about the nights
We had to get through
How did we get through?



wesley is staring at me.
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